May the Fours be with You

Mystics versus Edinburgh University Staff C.C., 25th July 1995

In this role play game you are Captain Peter Thomson, your job is to lead your team to victory by making the all the right decisions. There is only one route to success and many diversions along the way: use all your knowledge and PhD experience to find your way to the pub with the correct result under your belt! Good luck and may the fours be with you. ( Of course the right decisions are the ones that Peter took on the day, anything else would be foolish and not lead to a Mystic win! )

(1) Stardate: 25 July 1995 you have arrived at Peffermill Park, Edinburgh to play the university staff in a twenty over match. Your adversary is Captain Kerr. He beams down a coin and you win the toss, but do you decide to bat or bowl. If you want to bat click on link (26), if you want to bowl click on link (18).

(2) Bryan falls cheaply and is soon followed by Jim, Dan, and Deke. Fortunately Chris slogs his way to a rapid fifty, and finds a useful partner in Cook, who pushes singles with ease to keep Chris happy. With two overs remaining you need ten to win. Does Chris play the ball on its merit and take the game into the final over (15), or does Matthew deliberately run him out, in revenge for his father's appalling dismissal two years earlier (9)?

(3) You let Windy take the strike and off the next two overs he scores two, one off the last ball of each, ten is now required off the last over. The first three balls Windy tries to sweep and misses, the next he sweeps and connects, a top edge for four, the fifth ball he sweeps again, this time the edge goes straight in the air and is caught by the keeper. Enter Matthew Cook who needs to hit a six off one ball. Does he come down the wicket and loft the ball over the bowler's head for six (6), or does he move to leg and hit the ball over extra cover (11)?

(4) Wickets are now falling but you don't want to give anything away so you set a run saving field, you ask Charlie to field sweeper on the off side. In a quick discussion of tactics Charlie feels you would be better off fielding a four, four, two. Confused at first you eventually realise that what he means is four on the off, four on the on, the two being the bowler and wicket keeper, which leaves Charlie free to go to the pub. You tell him there is plenty of drinking time later and move him close to the wicket to save the quick single. The next ball Derek bowls a slow full toss that the batsman middles and Charlie saves a certain four by stopping it right between the eye's. Derek is distraught and goes off the field to seek comfort from his wife, and a bottle of Talisker. When Charlie comes to does he jump up shouting "Penalty ref, send him off, Exeter tra la la!" (7), or does Windy tell him to get his head down (16)?

(5) It's 46 for no wicket after just 8 overs so you decide to bring on Freddie. "This should change things a bit", you think, and you're right. After one over from the trusty young swing bowler the score becomes 57 for no wicket. Freddie looks jaded after his recent couple of holes of golf and eighteen pints of Bass. But do not despair because, thanks to some expert captaincy and fine diplomacy, in Freddie's next over the ball is pushed to mid wicket and Bailey calls for a quick single. In runs Kevin. A pick up and throw later and it's goodnight Mr Bailey and well done Kevin. Two overs later and you witness an on field miracle. Does Kevin repeat the direct throw run out (29), or does he take a skying catch on the boundary (20)?

(6) As you watch the ball sailing over the boundary the vision fades and you wake up in bed at Lendrick, you realise it's all been a crazy dream. The game hasn't even started yet (go back and start again)!

(7) Thanks to a good last effort by everyone, and some fine singing from Charlie, you have managed to keep the staff down to 112 for 8. You feel the team needs a reward between innings, so you go with Dr Bailey into town for some chips. Unfortunately it takes three hours and fifty chip shops before you find one that actually sells chips, and when you return the game is over and no one is sober enough to tell you what happened.

(8) Throughout the innings Dan has striven manfully behind the stumps and no-one is more delighted than you when Jim finds the edge of McGinnity's bat and Dan takes a comfortable catch and celebrates with a quick rendition of 'Quoc Ca'. Then off the last ball of the last over Marsh skies a Cook leg break high into the air and you realise Dr Derek is under it. Do you panic and try to get there first (17), or do you walk casually off the field knowing the catch will be taken with ease, to give Matthew Cook his first Mystic wicket (12)?

(9) Chris is very unhappy at being run out and a fight ensues. Just as you think Matthew is using his height advantage to full effect the police arrive and they are both carted off. You have no choice but to forfeit the game and go in search of a solicitor.

(10) The score is 101 when Kerr comes on and the captain persuades Bryan to slog in the air and he is caught, 19 well-timed runs off just 17 balls. You must now go in to see your team safely through to victory. You still need 12 off three overs and Windy is at the other end, you must decide weather to give Windy some much needed batting practice (3), or take the responsibility of wining the game yourself (30)?

(11) Unfortunately Matthew is just not strong enough, yet, and the ball bounces once before crossing the boundary. You lose by one run, bad luck Captain, try again.

(12) You need to overhaul 112 off 20 overs. You know it could have been a lot worse, had it not been for some Boycott like running between the wickets. You understand from the spectators report that it probably was not the first time the staff batsman have been involved in misunderstandings in the middle. Indeed one batsman was overheard, on returning to the pavilion, to complain in a Wildean manor (as is befitting of such educated persons) "once is unfortunate, twice is fucking malice". The game must continue and you must decide your batting order. Do you open with the hard hitting pair of Healey and Thomson, J. (25), or do you play the safety-first option of Miller and Hadley (21)?